Homophobia

A phobia is to have an irrational fear of something. Homo in this context is used in respect to Homosexuality. So what is homophobia? It has become a massively hyper used term in political debate and personal attack. Is the term homophobia being applied correctly?

People who identify as lesbian, gay, or bisexual may experience harassment or discrimination from people who are scared of or uncomfortable with these identities.

But, you can surely disagree with the homosexual lifestyle without discriminating against people that are homosexual. Furthermore, is everyone that disagrees with a homosexual lifestyle truly and irrationally afraid of homosexuals?

According to Planned Parenthood, "The homophobia definition is the fear, hatred, discomfort with, or mistrust of people who are lesbian, gay, or bisexual. Biphobia is fear, hatred, discomfort, or mistrust, specifically of people who are bisexual."

Planned Parenthood is irresponsible with this definition because they choose to use "or" rather than "and" to bind the various conditions they outline. Being uncomfortable around a homosexual person does not alone make you homophobic yet according to Planned Parenthood it does. Merely meeting one condition without the rest is insufficient evidence of a phobia. For this reason Planned Parenthood loses all all credibility in having any consideration of their definition of terminology.

It is true that people with homosexual or bisexual orientations have been stigmatized during some or many periods of human existence. It is also true that these people have found wide spread acceptance during certain periods of human existence and in particular ancient to present societies.

But who has the right to pass a blanket mental health diagnoses on a massive group of people that object to the homosexual lifestyle? Apparently progressives and gay activists feel that they have such a right and they are not being challenged in today's woke politically correct society. Well, except for sometimes, when a brave citizen or parent decides to speak out.

Here is some portion of a correspondence about the issue which can be read and considered when helping to understand what has become a very dangerous definition for the term homophobia.

Concerned Parent Speaks Out on Offensive Label

Mrs. xxxxx Ed.S,

I have not personally met you yet, however I do know and respect Principal xxxxx and I have been apprised of your manner of handling things at the school by students of the school other than my own children. When I read your email message it makes me aware that you have a different approach to handling things than does xxxxx or at least that is an observation I have made and I mean to convey this awareness in a neutral way.

So You Can Learn a Little About Me

My wife and I are concerned parents that pay relatively close attention to our children's education and we try to be involved in supporting the school's effort in providing that education. Our children have been fortunate to have had many positive experiences with teachers that they seem to sincerely like.

When I receive correspondence from the school about my child I always take the time to address it with my child. In this particular example my wife and I felt the need to have a discussion with xxxxx about kindness to other students. We want xxxxx to understand that God wishes for xxxxx to be kind to other students and not insult them or hurt their feelings. I should point out that kindness, appropriateness of conduct, and adherence to school policy were all addressed.

Objective

The goal is to use every event in life as a learning moment to help us all improve ourselves. Ironically this is a great opportunity for you, as an influence and figure of authority in my child’s life, to also learn something. This is why I have taken the time to express a concern that I have with your response and I hope you value my feedback and respect my point of view.

Caution and Responsibility

On part of your correspondence I believe you have recklessly used a term that suggests a psychological condition, or rather, you have erroneously used a term that I caution you to spend some time reflecting on yourself in thinking about the term and its actual meaning. You have stated that xxxxx has been accused of using so called “homophoebic” words. Whether it is homophoebic or homophobic without the extra “e” is neither the point nor am I certain, however we will accept for the sake of argument the extra “e” is correct since that is how you presented the word.

Again, I addressed with xxxxx that it is important to be kind to other students. It is wrong to say things that are not kind to another student in regards to a particular belief that another student may hold.

Where I believe you to be reckless and irresponsible in your position over xxxxx is that you are acknowledging, from another student in their launching of an accusation against xxxxx, that they are qualified to make a mental health diagnoses.

Open Minded Exploration

Lets explore this term, homophoebic, together to help you better understand how it has been weaponized by partisan individuals in our society and so that you can better understand how using such a term with a parent that does not necessarily share acceptance of this use as it presents a secular agenda. Furthermore perhaps it is possible for you to understand how a person of faith might perceive the term to have clear anti-Christian bias with contemporary blanket application.

Transgression of the Accusing Party

Homophoebic, containing “phoebic / phobic” or a phobia which by itself has traditionally been considered an irrational fear of something. Often we might find the use of a term as a phobia in a mental health diagnosis. So, if one student were to accuse another of speaking in a manner that he or she has a mental health disorder, I think that should be addressed with the accuser in that it is also unkind and wrong to assert a mental health disorder against another student based on something he or she has said.

Since you either echoed the term homophobic from the accuser or you concluded that the term was appropriate to use yourself based on the accusation, I think you should now reflect on your own misstep. It is wrong to make the assertion that one of your students irrationally fears something based on hearsay, and based on any one students personal beliefs. No student should make such an accusation either.

Anyone can disagree with another individual’s lifestyle without necessarily having an irrational fear of the lifestyle. For example, a person might dislike dogs without having a fear of our canine friends. I might observe an individual expressing that they do not care for dogs while reserving the psychological diagnosis of a phobia. Johnny does not wish to own a pet dog because he fears dogs and should seek professional treatment for a mental health disorder. I am not qualified to pass this kind of diagnosis.

Suggesting a Student Has a Phobia

Hopefully you understand that Homophoebic is a term that should not be so recklessly applied. It suggests a mental health related diagnosis that neither you nor another student is justified in making based on any evidence in this matter at this particular point in time and this particular use of the term may actually reveal a lack of objectivity.

Sharing the Same Goal

It is important that you constrain the matter to that which is pertinent to a productive and rational outcome, which is to make sure that students are considerate of one another's feelings and beliefs. We wish to help students not be cruel, and understand that intentionally hurting a child’s feelings is not a righteous thing to do. I want xxxxx and xxxxx peers to adhere to school policy and moral constructs for the sake of everyone in the school.

Credibility

You compromise your objective when you imply or echo a term that potentially exposes your own possible secular bias. Whether or not you are a Secular Humanist or Christian you should appreciate that morally it is important to be kind to other people. This is the point. I want xxxxx to be kind to other people. Policy is meant to enforce order, and we want an environment where students are comfortable and respectful so they can focus on the goal of receiving education.

Respecting ALL Points of View

Hopefully you understand that if a student expresses his or her disagreement with a particular lifestyle that he or she does not necessarily have an irrational fear of the lifestyle and merely to disagree with a lifestyle is not wrong and is also a valid opinion as long as it is not charged with insult and cruelty. I would prefer it if such sexual lifestyle discussions were reserved for places outside of the school, but I have little control over this and have to live with the reality that public school today is full of distractions from the intended purpose of education on accepted curriculum. I send my children to school to receive an education, not indoctrination.

A Parent's Point of View

Hopefully you can understand my concern as a parent that children in school should perhaps spend less time talking about their own personal sexuality and more time learning the subject matter of their various classes. If children are having inappropriate sexually related discussions then they increase the probability of receiving a challenging opinion on said beliefs. Christians today know and understand this, as it seems if you mutter the name Jesus in a public area you often find yourself being ridiculed and challenged with no one objecting, but you dare not offer any criticism of people’s sexual lifestyle even if people are being very public and outspoken about the lifestyle. This is an inequality and growing prejudice now festering in our country and public schools.

Time for Reflection

This is an opportunity for xxxxx to reflect on kindness and appropriateness of conduct. This is an opportunity for you to reflect on your choice of actions and words. Hypothetically, in your position I would correct a student coming to me with an accusation containing a mental health diagnoses. Furthermore I would never consider echoing a thoughtless and wrongly applied mental health diagnose to a parent in an incident report. My xxxxx is not homophobic, and neither are the good people in my community and in my church that share our faith in God and our belief in how people are meant to live. Please refrain from using terminology that, even if unintentional, may reflect a point of view that could be just as hurtful to our faith as what my child is being accused of saying in regards to another student’s own sex lifestyle.

Please Respect and Consider My Response

Finally, this response to your xxxxx is not meant to be an invitation for back and forth debate. It is meant to clearly convey two specific things. Firstly, I do not approve of xxxxx saying things that may be intentionally hurtful to another student and I will continue to aggressively take action as a parent to help xxxxx understand this. I want my children to be kind and considerate to other people. xxxxx has historically been known for being kind and considerate by the educators and staff of the school and I do not wish for xxxxx to do anything to diminish this reputation. I am going to continue to stress to xxxxx the importance of being considerate to other individuals and to maintain a positive reputation. Young people do not always appreciate the consequences for their words and actions until they are much older and retrospectively reflect.

Deliberative and Analytical

Secondly, I wish for you to consider that your choice of words could also be perceived wrongly and that homophoebic is a word often leveraged by partisan individuals attacking people of Christian Faith. Surely this is not your intent and now that you are hopefully more aware of the term’s actual meaning and how it is often wrongly applied you will reserve its use and be more critical of students attempting to leverage it in their accusation against other students.

Kind regards, xxxxx

Being Against Gay Marriage Doesn't Make You a Homophobe

Cardinal Timothy Dolan, Archbishop of New York, claimed on Meet the Press that the Catholic Church is unfairly “caricatured” as anti-gay.

Homosexual author Brandon Ambrosino notes, "If it’s anti-gay to question the arguments of marriage-equality advocates, and if the word homophobic is exhausted on me or on polite dissenters, then what should we call someone who beats up gay people, or prefers not to hire them? Disagreement is not the same thing as discrimination. Our language ought to reflect that distinction."